Abigoliah Schamaun

Comedian, Yogi, Whiskey Enthusiast. 

Juice Cleansing: Yep, Definitely Bullshit.

Juice Cleansing: Yep, Definitely Bullshit.

*Originally Posted January 4, 2016

IT’S OVER. IT’S FINALLY OVER.

I woke up at noon today (shut up that’s progress). Then went down to SoHo to a juice shop to get the days sustenance. They were sold out of all the green juices. The whole reason I wanted juice from that establishment was to get veg based juices! This is the most first world problem I’ve ever had in my life! I wound up mixing and matching today. I got an all green from a place called Fresh in SoHo, a series of small bottles from a company called Plenish, and Whole Foods actually had vegetable based juices!! Yippee!!! Another day of exercised missed but I did walk from SoHo to Camden and the walk was energizing and refreshing.

To be honest, this was the easiest day. I think my body is getting used to the limited calories. But I still doubt
this is entirely worth it. My friend Giles sent me aGuardian article stating detox diets such as juicing are “pseudo-medical concept designed to sell you things.” I did a little more googling and found and article written at Berkley Universitystating it’s a completely unnecessary exercise. You’re skin, liver, lungs are what detoxify the body, not potions and restrictive diets. Even the esteemed Mayo Clinic corroborated with the previous articles saying, “There’s little evidence that detox diets actually remove toxins from the body. Indeed, the kidneys and liver are generally quite effective at filtering and eliminating most ingested toxins.” Other reasons a person may juice such as: to get more vitamin heavy food, lose weight, or reduce appetite can be achieved, with a longer effect, by simply switching to a whole food, plant based diet.

I weighed myself this morning and I’ve lost 6.4 pounds in three days. As cool as that may sound, I’m sure I’ll gain it back as food touches my lips. Instead of feeling closer to a healthier lifestyle I feel further away. It’s like I took a giant step forward only to take a giant step back. But results aren’t in yet. Tomorrow I start chewing my food again. In another three days I’ll weight myself again to see if the 6.4 pounds has returned.

So it’s with that in mind, I leave juicing behind and go into Paleo. did all the shopping today my fringe is full of grass-fed meat and vegetables. Let phase two begin!

Paleo Diet Days 1,2, &3

Paleo Diet Days 1,2, &3

The Nights are Killing Me!

The Nights are Killing Me!